


Under the Moonlight

by shootystr



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:34:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22572574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shootystr/pseuds/shootystr
Summary: Can you do such things? Say such words? Even if you love me, are they worth it?
Relationships: Kim Seokwoo | Rowoon/Yoo Taeyang
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	1. under your gaze

All that Taeyang could think at that moment was the flowers he was leaving to water in his beautiful garden, to be there, for him, is a complete and total waste of time, the lips of the adults move in a frenzy so they decide his fate without consulting it, it was very unfair, but as his mother insists on reminding him, life is unfair.

His gaze drifts off the floor to the man in front of him, everything about Seokwoo irritates him, the way he looks serious and focused, the way his fine suit fits him so well, the grey suit had probably been done internationally and that just annoys more Taeyang, how can someone spend a fortune in a stupid suit when he himself is working so hard to put food on his family's table?

_After you marry, we will live comfortably._

His mother's words don't stop echoing in his mind, but what does it matter if he lives comfortably if he has to live unhappy? What good is he getting married and getting rich if he has to live the rest of his life with someone who doesn't love him or him to the other? How can you breathe knowing that your marriage is only meant to enhance Seokwoo's image and bring money to his family? An arranged marriage? Is this how the rich solve their problems?

It is, Kim Seokwoo must be the dream of many, already in his 20s is so rich that could buy an island if he wanted, heir to a huge corporate, naturally many would be happy to marry him, however Yoo Taeyang is not one of them.

"So you could sign the contract? We do not want complications'' the well-dressed plastic-clad woman, probably the mother of the highest, says with an arrogant tone, he still did not understand why it should be him? He has an older sister, the same age as Seokwoo, yet here he was, about to sign the contract that will define the rest of his life, why should he sacrifice himself? Why is it always him, Taeyang, the one to suffer?

"Of course" her mother responds quickly and signs the papers in a hurry, as if they were running away from the wooden table along with her opportunity to get rich at the expense of her child's unhappiness. How do people in India deal with arranged marriage? Do they at some point love those whom they were forced to marry? Or worse... lie down with them?

''What absurd'' his thoughts are transmitted aloud keeping everyone present there, confused, the Kim begin to question if Taeyang is in his perfect judgment, well, it is completely lucid at this time, marry someone who he has never seen in life? Get married for money? Just so his mother can live comfortably? And him? Will he be unhappy for the rest of his life?

Well, this situation is, for Yoo Taeyang, a complete absurdity.

His mother's annoyed look was enough for the unwilling kid to sign the paper in front of him, Taeyang's sigh after the act made his displeasure clear about the agreement, but this was only noticeable for Seokwoo who nonetheless remained his face gentle unchangeable, would he be a doll to always be so calm?

The rest of the day was a blur, it's as if the young man with colored hair was being controlled by wires, more specifically wires controlled by his mother, the woman kept talking as she arranged Taeyang's things, why he would have to move ? Could not Seokwoo come to him? Besides taking away his freedom of choice would he have to take out his room and his house as well?

_I'm of age, so why do I get carried away by my mother?_

Even asking himself this question without stopping, the young man can not stop accepting everything the old woman says. He had lost his father a long time ago, when he was still learning to talk, so it was always him, his mother and his sister, the older one had left home as soon as she got a job leaving only him and his mother alone, that's why the young man does everything his mom asks for.

''Yah, you will try to call me every day?'' The boy's gaze with hair gray and blue looks at his mother without understanding, tears coming down the woman's face, he was worried to think about how unfair it was to him that he had not thought about what his mother would suffer when she get alone, even though she had brought that whole situation, even though she was aiming for money at his expense, Taeyang could somehow understand her wishes and motives.

''Don't cry... I'll come here every day, okay? Let's have tea together, okay?'' his arms pass around his mother in comfort, stay for a few minutes like this, quietly embraced, the financial situation of his family never was out of the worst, but after his mother had an accident at work she had to retire and the only the income of the house was from Taeyang, who was still not very big because the boy never had the chance to enter a higher education institution.

Soon he was in the car, the luggage in the trunk, his mother waving and crying outside while the taxi driver started leaving his house which he had lived so long, behind, how everything had gone so fast? As if a blink was enough for hours to pass, it might be the melancholy set in the air, or perhaps Taeyang's fear of seeing Seokwoo who was preaching to him pieces just speeding up time.

The sun which always guides him through the day is now settling down, his head leaning against the cold window, the landscape of the city passes blurred as the speed of the vehicle increases, the thoughts fade from Taeyang's head, all that dominates his head is the melody of the music, perfect to represent his feelings, calm, melancholic and without any word.

x

  
''Do you want to eat something?'' Taeyang's hands go through the soft tissue of the bed that he would stay until the wedding day, only the room is probably worth more than his whole house, it makes him angry, angry because of people like Seokwoo, who own everything, while others do not have nothing, and now there he was speaking in a calm, sweet tone as if he owned the world and time.

"No'' Taeyang's reply is short but without disrespect, he would have to live with the man until the end of his life, so he should not develop a bad relationship, however much he may already hate him.

"Okay then'' without even insisting the older turn around and leave, leaving the younger one alone, Taeyang can not help himself to feel violated, his privacy now invaded by a man whom he does not even know, the tones of gray of the room reminds him of a prison.

_Yeah, this is just a prison._

The young man let out a delicate sigh and began to undo his suitcase, the night had already fallen and the faint moonlight entered his room as if trying to console him, despite wanting to be distracted by the organization for a long time his lack of personal belongings prevents him from spending much time there, not half an hour later Taeyang is in his favorite flannel pajamas lying in the dark room staring at the ceiling, the more he thinks about how his life is, the less he understands it.

A weak knock on the door pulls him out of his tortuous thoughts, his lazy stare turns to the door where Seokwoo is leaning barefoot, his silk pajamas seem to make him just as handsome as if it were possible for someone with such perfect beauty, if he had not seen him there with his own eyes, he would say that Seokwoo is a wax doll.

"I bought Jjajjangmyun come and eat'' as much as Seokwoo's bossy tone makes him angry, he's really hungry, he do not remember the last time he ate, was the day before? All this marriage matter did not give him time or appetite to eat. The young man's footsteps are slow, the smell of food makes his stomach rumble and his mouth is filled with water, he is definitely full of hunger, the table is lit only by a dim light which seems to be almost burning.

"You don't know how to change lamps?" the direct question surprises Seokwoo who just denies with his head picking up his hashi and placing a good portion of the noodles in his mouth, an angry laugh comes from Taeyang's lips. How could he be so handsome even eating? His dirty mouth irritates the young man, how he could feed himself when he had just signed a prison contract for the rest of his life.

"Are you not going to eat?" the simple question of the older wakes Taeyang who sits in the cold chair and looks at the pot in front of him, the steam coming out of the food accompanies an irresistible smell making him forget the reason to be there, good food always comforted him his dark moments and sad thoughts, the taste of the bean paste dominates his palate leaving him in ecstasy, the really delicious food holds his full attention, however it ends as fast as he began to eat, so he ends sketches a satisfied smile and looks to Seokwoo who is admiring without saying a word, then the lamp goes off with a blink and the moonlight that enters the window bathes them with melancholy.

Without thinking Taeyang released what he had been wanting to ask since the meeting in the morning.

''Why me?'' Seokwoo is caught off guard by the sudden question, he seems to ponder for a few seconds before sketching a smile, arrogant in Taeyang's eyes.

''Because I like you'' the answer freaks out the younger, he never even exchanged words with the older one how could this liking him?

''We do not know each other.''

''Hm. True'' the smile on Seokwoo's lips did not go away with this statement ''But I know you... We studied together in the same school, you shouldn't remember me because I was two years ahead of you, but until my last day there I saw every day how you managed to shine even when you were sad, how quiet and sweet you were, even a little shy'' he laughs as he says this word, his gaze seems distant as if he were remembering ancient times in which he sat in the dining room at a few tables away from Taeyang just to watch the newest eating ''I remember the day I fell in love with you... I was passing a flower shop, the way you looked at the flowers'' a cheerful sigh escapes from his lips the way words flow passionately out of his mouth scares Taeyang ''I do not think I've ever seen someone have so much affection for something, it was at that moment that I decided that I wanted to have it for me... But... It does not matter, we're here now, I'm sorry for the way though I promise to treat you with the best and make you happy the way I can, I can give you everything you want after all there's no limit to what my money reaches'' Only after uttering the words Seokwoo notices his mistake.

"I do not want your money." With those words, Taeyang leaves the table and goes to his room, anesthetized by the older's words, not believing what he had just heard, even if Seokwoo really loved him, would that be a justification for everything? To arrest him? Even under a contract, even if Seokwoo had not held him there against his will, the feeling of suffocation and imprisonment did not leave the Taeyang system.

_It's a lie, it has to be... If it is not one of the two will be hurt in the end, and as always will be me, Yoo Taeyang._


	2. the moonlight on your lips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING -> This chapter contains some +18 scenes, if you do not like it, do not read it.

His mouth was dry but the young man does not dare get out of his bed, it's been a few hours since he had argued with Seokwoo, and his heart still tightens every time he remembers the man's words ''. _..I fell in love with you..._ " it is difficult, for Taeyang, to believe that Seokwoo really loves him, to say such words these days is such an empty and meaningless thing, young people say it all the time by the most useless of things.

_What 'I love you' mean to you Seokwoo?_

No matter that Taeyang sees sincerity in the eyes of the older, the pain of thinking that he will be attached to him for the rest of his life without the right to divorce if it is not for the sake of both of them drives him crazy, why did he sign the contract himself? His mother's face in sorrow for parting cuts off his heart and quenches his turbulent thoughts.

He was there for her.

And he can't forget that, after all she had worked and lost a lot for him. With a sigh Taeyang jumps out of bed and goes to the kitchen to be surprised to see the taller still there, leaning asleep on the table, the packaging of his dinner still there, in the hand of Seokwoo a paper catches the attention of Taeyang who takes the paper very carefully, curious with its contents opens him surprising to read with a delicate and beautiful handwriting his own name, the sheet had a date to be behind an impression, read the date of his birthday the previous year had frightened him, would be Seokwoo really speaking the truth about loving him for so long? Meanwhile Taeyang returns the paper calmly and turns towards the refrigerator, taking the water and filling the glass to its limit, before drinking the transparent liquid the boy observes the drops sliding through the cold glass, before realizing his tears go down together at the same speed as the drops.

"Do not you see that it costs me so much?" his whisper is low and even inaudible to himself, his mouth half open and his head down makes it clear that he is discouraged and unwilling to continue that, if he could he would end it all right there, maybe escape, but he would never be able to leave his mother "I'll try for you, but do not hate me if I get lost" his whispering pause as the sobs begin, the tears are coming down one after another at a rapid speed, his knees buckle and Taeyang bends down on the floor crying not knowing when he will stop.

\- x -

Listening to the youngest crying hurts him, hurts like hell, after a month living next to Taeyang, Seokwoo had to listen to the boy's sobbing every night and during the day the young man's failed attempts to approach the one that considered so strongly that it's imprisoner.

Seokwoo tried everything to make their living together better, bought flowers, the younger man's favorite food and even invited him to watch a movie with him, but none of his attempts stopped the boy's with colored hair to fall in to tears. Not knowing what to do, the older man takes the contract and looks at it sadly, thinking that he was being brilliant, that the moment Taeyang knew of his feelings he would accept it, though he was only rejected by the younger.

But the rejection did not hurt, at least not so much as hearing the boy slide across the wall and sob non-stop for hours with no end, the day before Seokwoo had asked Taeyang when he would like them to marry, the face of the youngest was of terror, if the taller one was about to eat him alive, the more he thought about it, the more Seokwoo wants to let Taeyang go.

_I can not force you to love me the way I love you._

Giving up the love of his life would not be easy, so the young man picks up a paper and writes a short farewell, determined to leave the younger, after all he had never intended to be cruel and really arrest Taeyang as would do a jailer.

_Dear Taeyang,_

_I would like to apologize for submitting you to such a tortuous month by my side, I will cancel the contract if it is your wish, I ask only that you do what will make you happy._

_I love you,_

_Kim Seokwoo._

Maybe signing like this would make it more formal? Should Ihe just put ' _fondly, Seokwoo_ '? Or maybe just sign his name? Difficult to think about how he should sort his intimacy with the boy since they never exchanged many moments next to each other, the month had been practically of the smaller one ignoring Seokwoo.

So much wasted time, to know that for having started in a wrong way maybe the older one can never get close to the younger one hurts him, if he could change his choices he would change, but it is not possible to change the past, he takes short, calm steps to the room of Taeyang, who was at his mother's house, so the empty room made room for Seokwoo to leave the brief letter under his bed and go to his room. The silk sheets never comforted him so much on such a cold night, leaving the window open so that only the light of the moon illuminates his room the young man lies down and soon falls asleep with only Yoo Tae Yang in his thoughts.

\- x -

The letter surprised him, but he would not shy away from giving his mother a good life, only if he was sure that when he left, he would be able to support his mother as she deserves without making her suffer, seeing him work so hard, his day had been tired to think about Seokwoo's words correctly, then the young man decides to lie down and fall asleep right there, he had spent the day after work, he had seen some flower shops that needed help, but he was not confident in his interview and probably ruined them.

With a weary sigh, Taeyang looks at the ceiling of his room and reflects on the last month he had been there, even though he was only there for Seokwoo's money, at no time did he accept it or his gifts, the older's statements were only deliberately ignored by the younger, the house no longer looked like a prison, no matter how hard he tried, the young man could find no reason to hate his 'future husband', but only the thought of marrying someone who he did not love is completely outrageous.

Silence sets in his thoughts for many minutes before rising and going to the kitchen as every night get a glass of water, but this time Taeyang is surprised by the presence of Seokwoo who is with his back to the younger, the smell of alcohol in the air reports that the older one was altered before it even opened the mouth.

"I'm sorry for making you suffer." His voice trails off, making it difficult for Taeyang to identify and join the dots to understand him. "I never meant to do this to you, you can go." The older man shakes his glass causing the ice to hit the sides of the cup making a noise that fills the silence.

''Seokwoo, you're drunk'' strangely speaking the scene in front of him, Taeyang tries to withdraw the glass from the older's hand, but this one deflects and holds the youngest that almost falls with his other hand, the fright causes the highest to drop the glass of his hand and this shatter on the ground in a thousand pieces.

"Taeyang you're very close" the older man's voice sounds low and hoarse from the drink, his eyes are focused on the young man's lips so close to his hand, however, as soon as he notices the lower reaches and takes a deep breath.

"Go to sleep, you're drunk, I'll go to my bed." Turning to leave with a thousand heart, Taeyang returns to his room and closes the door hastily as if someone is chasing him, his heart is accelerated by the proximity to Seokwoo, but the speed does not diminish with the order of the boy, he tries to calm himself closing his eyes, however doing this it only worsens visualizing the scene of Seokwoo face so close to his again.

_What's happening to me?_

\- x -

Three months pass after the incident, Seokwoo leaves Taeyang giving him space to think and self-understand, but the absence of the older only confuses the younger one that every time he saw him or even looked at him in the eye, short phrases like ''have you eaten?'' ''do not wait for me today'' were already becoming routine.

More and more Taeyang's heart seemed to be falling for Seokwoo, but in an inner conflict with his mind which still insisted on telling him that this situation was nothing more than a case of Stockholm syndrome, but the kindness of the tallest had never put him in any situation that presented an environment of kidnapping or imprisonment.

The night was cold and dark, Taeyang had spent the day at home, was tired of trying to get a job every day and always hang on the interview, was almost giving up trying, the tea was still with the steam when Seokwoo arrived, again late, his tired footsteps, the tie hanging around his neck, and his head-down look indicate that his day had not been so good, again the youngest wish he could overcome his inner conflict and try to approach the older who would soon be his husband, what is the use of hating if they will live until death put them part?

Before the highest enters his room he is stopped by Taeyang calling his name low, but the silent night causes the other to hear him clearly.

''Let's start from scratch?'' Seokwoo's happiness did not fit in his chest at those words, but the day had been so bad that he could not even utter the words or the feature of happiness he was capable of doing.

''Hm... Taeyang... Sure'' his low voice leaves the younger man worried, then before he realizes what he is doing Taeyang wraps the tall one in a tight embrace surprising him by the tender act he had never received in the four months they were together "Can you stay by my side?" Seokwoo's low sweet voice causes Taeyang to accept without much thought, the two go to the older man's room ''Just until I fall asleep.''

The young man sitting down in the upholstered chair next to the bed of the highest, the dark silk sheets are illuminated by the dim light of the room, the boy watches the whole room intently, it was at least bland, the colors gray and the square shape and not a little fun of all left Taeyang sad, many say that someone's room says a lot about the person.

And Seokwoo's room said he was lonely.

The older one pulls off his robes being watched by the younger, every move from Seokwoo to Taeyang, is utterly sensual, the way he takes each button off with precision and delicacy, the way light seems to favor every part of his body.

Definitely see Kim Seokwoo semi-nude, it was the vision of paradise.

The man's pajamas cover his body again causing Taeyang to let out an involuntary sigh of protest, hearing the older man give a sweet-faced smile and lie down on the bed while the younger man sits down.

"Are you going to sit down until I sleep?"

"Hm... No?" Seokwoo's smile, Taeyang realizes that the intentions of the highest are not the most pure, but when thinking better he lies in front of him, the room is only illuminated by the light of the moon that enters the room mainly illuminating Seokwoo, his lips and face seemed to be being targeted by a spotlight, for Taeyang he could only see this.

His eyes stayed connected for several seconds before the older man dimmed the distance with a sweet, calm kiss, the taste of mint and cinnamon from Seokwoo's mouth was wonderful, both lips touch gently, the kiss is innocent and just belong to both and no one else.

Seokwoo's hands lightly descend Taeyang's back and rise slowly causing shivers all over the younger's body. It's too early? To lie down with him? Rational thoughts flee from the mind of the lower as the highest deepens the kiss, wrapping it more in the rhythm of their passion, Seokwoo's tongue explores every corner of Taeyang's mouth. In decisive and rapid steps the older man climbs on the young man next to him, the kiss slowly becomes more ardent, the younger's heart does not seem to fit in his chest for the speed that is beating with nervousness.

When realizing the nervousness of Taeyang, Seokwoo slows down slowly removing the pieces of clothing of the smaller one with delicate kisses in its skin that is being slowly exposed. His lips on Taeyang's sensitive skin made him let out a few low moans, showing that he was enjoying the other's actions, Seokwoo's firm hands dictate every move the youngest must make to remove the man's silk pajamas in front of him, upon seeing the naked skin of the target of his passions, the younger one feels stunned. How can anyone be as beautiful as he?

When Seokwoo's mouth reached his neck Taeyang no longer controlled his moans, his actions purely carried by the pleasure of the moment made him touch Seokwoo's body until his intimacy was stimulated by giving equal pleasures to the man he provided. The purest moment that the two of them had already participated in was that, the bodies moving in a perfect rhythm, the sweet and slow touches, the affection of both towards each other so that the feeling shared with the exchange of fluids and touches. The actions was not only for the purpose of pleasure, but also to place feelings not understood by themselves, outwardly.

_I tried to hate you and tried to understand you, no matter how hard i fought against my heart, I could not deny that in the end, all I wanted was to just have you and love you with all my being._


End file.
